Wendy's First S-Class Mission
by The Evil Stick
Summary: A deadly STD threatens the lives of every member from the Blue Pegasus guild after the Trimens flirt with the wrong lady. The only cure is the magical healing power of the Sky Dragon Slayer. Join Wendy as she leads Team Natsu in the race to keep Blue Pegasus from going extinct. WARNING: excessive blushing, probable traumatization, a shirtless Master Bob, and implied promiscuity.
1. Prologue

The Evil Stick here! One of my first fics from a long time hiatus. Hope you like busting your gut because I like writing raunchy comedies. **Hiro Mashima** comes up with the most colorful characters and so I am hijacking them for my stories. The diverse characters of **Fairy Tail** are my favorite. Here's the prologue to The Evil Stick's "Wendy's First S-Class Mission." I promise Wendy and Team Natsu will be in the next chapter.

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Prologue

"This is an outrage. The Trimens from Blue Pegasus have come to stop me?," The elderly mage with long, pale green hair curled her wrinkled lip up at the four men who stood in front of her. "I thought the town would have sent the job request to a more talented guild like Fairy Tail or Sabertooth. They have underestimated my power and insulted me by sending a second rate guild!"

*Sniff Sniff* "Men… I detect the parfume of maturity," Ichiya artfully pointed two of his stumpy fingers at the frail old lady.

"I can be your pet if you want me to. I'll even purr in your lap…," Eve blushed and smiled sweetly at the old lady who suffers from a serious case of osteoporosis.

The lady had a look of pure disgust on her thin, horse-like face.

Hibiki smoothed back his hair with his hand "Your strength as a mage is admirable. Lovely women your age possess experience that can make men shiver in fright… or delight."

"Indeed. Every man needs a cougar at some point in time." Ren jutted out his hips and tilted his head to the ground "I am very mindful of joints, and I promise not to break your hips… unless you want me too."

Her jaw dropped and her dentures slowly lowered towards ground leaving a long trail of glue and saliva from her mouth. The four men in front of her blushed as she scrambled to put them back in place.

Hibiki tapped on his magical keyboard "According to my archive, there are many advantages to a smooth oral cavity."

Ren smoothed out his shirt "I'm always eager to try new things… or in this case… old things."

"Men… the parfume of fine wine only grows sweeter with age" Ichiya struck a sexy pose.

"You can have me tucked in by 8 o'clock sharp" Eve held his hand shyly to his chest.

"ENOUGH!" She lifted an shaky, bony finger and the group of men "YOU CREEPY B-LIST CELEBRITIES WILL LEARN WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU CROSS A MAGE WITH THE POWER OF PLAGUE!"

The four Trimens were knocked to the ground by an invisible wave of magic given off by the petite old woman as her scratchy voice crackled out a maniacal laughter.

"Now, all those close to you will be affected by your philanderous ways!" She turned her back to them "Let that be a lesson to you!"

The pale old lady phased into a cloud of green smoke and floated away grumbling about "youth these days."

The Trimens watched as the green cloud floated out of town. They were surprised that they felt completely normal despite being hit with her magic wave.

"Men… mission accomplished" Ichiya stood on the tips of his toes and gave his victory pose.

"Aww… I wanted her to read me a bedtime story…" Eve sighed sadly.

"You scared her away, Eve" Ren pouted and shoved his hands into his pockets.

"It was you and that hip breaking comment!" Eve whined.

Hibiki sadly watched the cloud of green smoke down the road "It doesn't matter who it was that scared her off, the job requested that she be escorted out of town because she was scaring the townsfolk. I sort of feel sorry for her, she didn't even do anything to us."

Ichiya struck another pose "Men… I will collect the reward and we will head back to the guild."

The three men saluted the shorter man "Yes, Teacher!"

None of them gave another thought about the old lady who possessed the power of plague or her ominous warning:

"_Now, all those close to you will be affected by your philanderous ways!"_

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Short chapter, I know. Keep in mind this is only the prologue and I had to depict how they brought this illness on themselves. The story will follow Wendy from here on out.

**Too obnoxious? **Or did it just seem obnoxious because the prologue featured the Trimens? It's not easy to keep them in-character since they all have different flirting styles. **Review and tell me what you think.**


	2. The Symptoms

The Evil Stick again! This is chapter one of Wendy's First S-Class Mission. As promised, Wendy and Team Natsu are featured here. This fic is written (without permission) as a silly supplement to **Hiro Mashima's brilliant creation of Fairy Tail! **Enjoy!

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Chapter 1 - The Symptoms

Wendy sat at a table next to Lucy as Carla reprimanded a half naked Gray on the importance of remaining clothed in the presence of little girls.

"Yeah, Ice Perv! No one wants to see your naked butt!" Natsu interrupted.

"And you!" Carla's squeaky voice boldly pitched as she pointed a finger in Natsu's face "You are far too violent and irresponsible! What kind of example are you setting for young Wendy?"

"Yeah, Natsu!" Happy interjected. Carla just "hmphed" and turned her nose up away from him.

Lucy sighed, "There aren't any good job requests on the board right now. All we can do is wait."

Wendy ducked as a stray snowball flew toward her face "It's just another boring day at Fairy Tail. I can't wait until I can do my own missions."

Just then, the guild doors swung open to reveal an angry Laxus along with the Thunder God Tribe. Laxus didn't acknowledge any of his comrades. He just stomped upstairs and into Makarov's office. The Thunder God Tribe made their way to the bar to speak to Mira and Erza.

Bixlow laughed loudly with his tongue hanging out "Remind me to use a fresh razor next time I decide to groom myself!" He laughed again as he scratched his crotch feverishly.

"Itchy! Itchy! Itchy! Burn! Burn!" his babies chanted as they danced around his head.

"Ugh!" Evergreen turned her nose up at him "Are you sure your problem is from a rusty razor or is it from all those classless women you hang around with?"

His tongue retreated for a few moments while he seriously contemplated the answer and then his tongue came out for a grin "It must have been the razor. I've never had such dry skin before. Right babies?"

"Landing strip! Landing strip! Itchy! Itchy! Burn!" They all bobbed in agreement as Bixlow happily continued to scratch his crotch.

Erza and Mira shuddered in disgust while Freed shrugged, completely unfazed by Bixlow's behavior.

Evergreen hit him on the head with her fan "You're disgusting! No one wants to know that!"

Just then, Laxus and Makarov came out of the office and stood just behind the balcony. The Master cleared his throat signaling an announcement causing Grey and Natsu to stop fighting.

"Children! I have a very important announcement!" A large fist came down on Natsu just as he was about to set Grey's discarded clothing on fire.

There was a large gust of wind as Doranbolt teleported next to the Master and Laxus. They simply nodded at each other before he continued, "Laxus and his team just got back from an urgent request by the council. It seems as though yesterday morning some members of Blue Pegasus were cursed during a mission. As of this morning, the entire guild has fallen ill from the unknown disease."

There was a collected gasp from the Fairies as well as some other random comments: "Will they be okay, Master?" "It's probably just crabs…" "That's awful!" "That's a man!" "How serious is the disease?" "Mira, can I get a beer refill!"

"QUIET!" Laxus yelled at the crowd below him, "This disease is very serious and it's progressing at a very rapid rate! Me and my team left early this morning to round up and quarantine the sick members of Blue Pegasus! Every single member of the guild is showing symptoms and the Trimens seem to be the furthest along!"

Master once again cleared his throat "The symptoms start with minor skin irritation and dark blue spots start to cover the entire body. Within 12 hours the bruises turn into open sores accompanied by fever that can cause hallucinations and insanity. If the disease continues to progress at this rate, every member of Blue Pegasus will be dead by tomorrow!"

There was another collective gasp from the crowd and more random comments: "What can we do, Master?!" "Gihi!" "But they're our friends!" "Grey, my dear! You can cry on my shoulder." "Why would I want to do that?!" "Is the disease contagious?"

"EVERYONE SHUT-UP!" Laxus was tired of their inability to listen. "Doranbolt is here to fill everyone in on the details! If anyone else talks, I will permanently fry your mouth shut!"

Makarov nodded toward Doranbolt as he stepped forward to address the Fairies. "The magic council's health department has classified the disease as non-contagious and the general public is not at risk of infection. The Trimens rode the train back to guild and, thankfully, no civilians that came into contact with them showed any signs of sickness. We believe that the curse only affects members of Blue Pegasus."

Doranbolt leaned forward on the railing to emphasize his next point "However, all those affected by the disease haven't responded to any of the treatments provided by the magic council's medical team. There is no known cure or any relief to their symptoms!"

The guild remained quiet for once. The seriousness of the situation sunk into their hearts. Even after 7 years of being declared dead, their friends from Blue Pegasus continued to watch over the area were they vanished and came to collect them when they reappeared. Blue Pegasus, the guild that came to Fairy Tail's aid on Tenrou Island, would be extinct by tomorrow.

Doranbolt's eyes fell onto Wendy and he sighed. "Now, the only hope we have is in the lost healing magic of the Sky Dragon."

All heads turned towards their youngest member, Wendy. Her fists tightened into little balls and she had a look of determination on her face. "When can I leave?"

Doranbolt smiled at the young girl. "As soon as you get a team together. This is a special S-Class request from the council so you'll need to have a strong team to back you up."

"I'm all fired up!" Natsu, Grey, Lucy, Happy and Carla walked up to Wendy in support of her bravery.

Erza placed a hand on Wendy's small shoulder "We are right behind you Wendy. This time, you are the leader for the mission."

Makarov proudly nodded his head at the sappy show of cohesion of the group "Then it's decided. Wendy will lead Team Natsu in this mission. You may leave immediately."

Doranbolt hopped down from the second floor next to Wendy "I already used too much magic this morning teleporting everywhere so I can only take two of you."

Without question, Erza placed her hand on Doranbolt's shoulder and barked orders to the others to be on the next train. Doranbolt then picked up Wendy bridal style and cradled her close to his body.

"HEY! KEEP YOUR DISTANCE YOU SCAR-FACED CREEP!" Carla hovered in front of his face. "I KNOW YOU CAN TELEPORT HER WITH JUST A HAND ON HER SHOULD-!"

They were gone before Carla could finish her lecture.

Loke bowed to Lucy "The train leaves in 20 minutes, Princess. Do you need assistance with your luggage?"

"What are you doing here, Loke?" Lucy shielded her cleavage with her hand so Loke would stop looking down her shirt.

"Our love is so strong that the boundaries between our worlds have shattered" he gave his cheesiest grin as Bixlow yelled out his name.

"Yo, Loke! You ready? We can't keep the ladies waiting!" His babies bobbed around his head "Itchy! Itchy! Itchy! Burn! Burn!"

Loke's eyes lit up and he hurried after Bixlow "Call if you need me, Princess!"

"Hurry up, Lucy!" Carla commanded. "We can't leave Wendy alone with that weirdo for too long!"

Natsu and Gray were already pressing their foreheads together hurling insults at each other. Lucy just grabbed Natsu by the scarf and tugged him along and Gray followed after he picked up his clothes. The two exceeds led the way to the train station. It will only take about 3 hours to get to the Blue Pegasus Guild. They had no idea what horrors were waiting for them…

**At Blue Pegasus:**

Erza stood horrified at the scene in front of her. Doranbolt teleported her and Wendy into the main hall of the Blue Pegasus guild, but she was not ready for such a sight. Her allies laid in rows on generic cots moaning in agony as nurses from the Magic Council's Medical Department worked hard to keep their wounds bandaged. Some of the Blue Pegasus members sat on the floors along the hallways scratching at their black and blue bruises that covered their bodies. Most of them had ice packs on their foreheads to keep their temperature down.

Doranbolt lowered Wendy onto her feet and explained the conditions "Freed placed runes around the building so anyone with the Blue Pegasus stamp couldn't leave the premises. The Thunder God tribe quarantined all members of the guild in the main hall so our medical team could tend to them more efficiently and there would be no chance if it spreading to the general public."

Wendy swayed a little as she tried to adjust her senses to her surroundings. Doranbolt placed his hands on her tiny, undeveloped hips to steady her. The smell of blood, vomit, infection, and urine assaulted her dragon nose. The moans, labored breathing, and slowing heartbeats reminded her of the serious conditions her allies were in.

"Doctor! One of the patients just stopped breathing!" Someone yelled from behind some makeshift curtains in the guild hall.

Without hesitation, Erza and Wendy ran toward the commotion. When they pulled back the curtains they found the Trimens were in worse conditions than the other guild members. The doctor was attempting CPR on Ren's lifeless body while Eve's body was thrashing violently in a grand-mal seizure on the cot next to him.

Wendy rolled up her sleeves, "Everyone get out of my way!"

"Get out of here, little girl!" the doctor snarled at her. The doctor and nurses started backing away as they found themselves surrounded by 100 magical swords pointed at them.

"I suggest you move out of her way," Erza stood before them in her Heaven's Wheel Armor with a deadly look on her face which made them all scurry away in fear. Everyone around her is dying and she just threatened the lives of the health care providers, she couldn't possibly imagine the situation getting any worse…

"Men… either I'm in heaven or…" *coughs up blood* "…I detect the parfume of…" *wheeze* "…unwavering beauty." Ichiya turned his swollen face toward Erza. His eyes were swollen shut, blood was leaking out of his mouth, and bright green puss was oozing out of the many open sores on his black and blue face. Erza stiffened. If she thought Ichiya was ugly before, she was wrong.

Wendy was immediately at Ren's side casting her powerful healing spell.

Ren took in a jagged breath before opening one eye at her "My guardian angel is unbelievably beautiful."

Unfazed by Ren's pick-up line, she turned toward Eve's convulsing form and continued her healing spell.

Eve's seizure slowed and then completely stopped. His eyes opened and he gave a weak smile "Will you perform mouth-to-mouth too?"

Wendy ignored his comment and walked over to Hibiki's side. As soon as the magic started pouring out of her hands Hibiki could be heard "I think it's time for my sponge bath."

Wendy smiled up at Erza and Doranbolt, "It's done. I rid their bodies of the disease. They just need time to regain their strength."

Erza nodded to a proud Wendy. "Good work, Wendy. Heal as many as you can and then take a rest while we tend to the others." She requipped into her nurses uniform and walked away.

Doranbolt gave a sigh of relief and placed a hand on Wendy's small shoulder "I'll send word to your Master that your magic has given us hope."

Wendy smiled innocently and went to go heal Ichiya and the other members of Blue Pegasus. The next few days were going to be very exhausting for Wendy and her team.

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Yes, The Evil Stick is truly evil to make Ichiya even uglier and scarier than ever before. Next chapter will be _The Diagnosis_ and the disease will finally be revealed. Please feel free to **leave a review** if you have any suspicions about the nature of the disease!


	3. The Diagnosis

Whew! The Evil Stick spent all week installing new hardwood floors in the master bedroom. It's normally a one day job, but don't judge.

Much love to **Hiro Mashima** for his unmatched ability of character creation. Without him, I wouldn't have such awesome characters for my fake story.

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**The Diagnosis**

Lucy stood in the doorway of the Blue Pegasus guild with her knees quaking in fright "Are you sure that it's not contagious?"

"That's what Doranbolt said the Council's Health Department concluded." Grey took in the sight while keeping his fear under control.

"Gross!" Natsu wrapped his white scarf around his face so it covered his nose "Has the guild always smelled this bad before?! Jeez… you guys smell like dying piss and vomit."

"That's not very nice Natsu" Happy floated close to head so as not to walk on the carpet.

*SQUISH* "Ew! This carpet is soaked with blood and vomit" Lucy shivered.

Carla floated down the main hall, "I'm going to find Wendy."

It didn't take long for the group to find Erza. As soon as she saw them approach, she didn't even bother with greetings "Natsu! Happy! You're on sanitation duty! Get these carpets and dirty cots out of here and burn them."

"Aye!" They started pushing people off of the carpet to roll it up.

"Grey! You're on temperature duty! We ran out of ice packs about an hour ago so it's your job to keep ice on everyone's foreheads!"

"I'm on it" he walked away to the first patient who looked like their fever was out of control.

"Lucy! We need to keep these people clean otherwise their open sores will get infected!" Erza tossed her some hospital gowns.

"Uh… aren't these sores already a symptom of infection?" Lucy's stomach turned at the thought of changing the guild members out of their blood, puss, and urine stained clothing.

A dark aura began to emit from Erza, "Our patients need to be clean and dry!"

"R-right! Anything else, Er-Erza?" Lucy's face was flushed red from knowing that she will see every member of Blue Pegasus naked.

"Yes. The sponges and water bins are located by the sink behind the bar." Erza continued to monitor the vitals of the woman in front of her.

"WHAT?!" Before Lucy could protest, there was a bright flash of golden light.

"I will assist with the sponge baths." Virgo held up a sponge in each hand. "Unless you wish to punish me, Princess?"

Erza nodded "Thank you, Virgo. Impeccable timing as always. We can start with this patient."

Lucy watched as Virgo wet the sponge and started bathing the older fat woman that laid in front of Erza. She wasn't wearing a shirt so her large, sagging breasts were exposed. Bruises, deep scratch marks, stretch marks, a hairy navel, and smaller sores were revealed as Virgo wiped the blood and puss from her stomach area.

"Lucy! I thought you fought along side your spirits and didn't hide behind them?" Erza frowned at her. "Aren't you going to help…?"

"Um, yeah…" Lucy wet her sponge. She wiped the folds between the creases on the woman's neck and wiped under her doubled chin. She then removed the woman's earrings and cleaned her ears before replacing the earrings.

"Make sure you get every little nook and cranny," Erza pointed at the breasts.

Lucy shivered before she lifted the large, squishy breast and wiped the crusted puss from underneath the old woman's breast. She then applied ointment to the sores and lowered the breast back into place. Then she started washing the upper chest and noticed that the old woman's skin was hard to clean because of the dried blood stuck in the chest hair.

"Uh…Erza? How do I get all the blood out of this lady's chest hair?" Lucy's face was red at the question.

"Lady?" Erza stopped bandaging the legs and gave a puzzled look "You mean Master Bob?"

"…" Lucy studied the swollen face that was smeared with dried blood and covered in oozing sores. "I… I just… fondled… Master Bob…?"

"Yes, this is Master Bob." Erza went back to bandaging.

*RETCH* Lucy couldn't hold back the bile anymore. *SPLATTER*

"Princess! We're supposed to be cleaning, not throwing up all over the floors!"

**Elsewhere in Blue Pegasus:**

Carla floated through the hallways of the guild searching for Wendy. She had to use her Mach Speed ability to get past the flirting Trimens that were lurking in the hallways. What human tries to get an exceed into their bedroom, anyways?

She slowed when she turned a corner and saw Jenny walking "Excuse me, Miss? Have you seen Wendy?"

Jenny stopped and smiled at Carla "Yes, she's the young dragon slayer that saved us. She ran out of magic energy right after she finished healing me. That handsome council member took her to the guest bedroom to rest."

"Wha-?" A million horrible images went through Carla's mind "Where is the guest bedroom?!"

Jenny blinked "It's in the west wing…"

"Thank you!" Carla sped off toward the west wing.

Hibiki, Ren, and Eve came running around the corner covered in bandages, "Hey Jenny! Did you see that pretty white cat come this way?"

Jenny put her hand on her hip "No, I haven't."

Ren and Eve looked defeated as they sadly walked away.

Hibiki smiled politely "You look very beautiful today, Jenny."

Jenny smirked. She will make him forget all about that Sky Dragon's cat.

**Back in Magnolia:**

"RAHAHAHA!" Bixlow ran through the streets of Magnolia without his mask so everyone could see his bruised and scratched up face.

"Itchy! Itchy! Itchy! Burn! Burn!" his babies followed him while blowing up random objects along the streets.

After Bixlow's lunch date, he returned to the guild still scratching himself feverishly, but this time it was all over his body. Master Makarov ordered Macao and Wacaba to remove his mask and his bruised face was revealed. Just as Freed was about to quarantine him within his runes, Bixlow rode his dolls out of the guild which prompted the dangerous manhunt through the streets of Magnolia.

Lily monitored Bixlow from above "The council was obviously wrong about this disease not being contagious. And it's only been 4 hours since he got back from Blue Pegasus."

"Hit him with your iron fist, Gajeel!" Lisanna flapped her wings to steady herself in the air.

"This is ridiculous!" Gajeel bellowed from the rooftop that he was perched on. "I wouldn't touch that diseased freak with a 50 foot metal pole!"

Elfman yelled from below, "That's a man who has clearly lost his mind!"

Laxus landed on the rooftop next to Gajeel, "He hasn't lost his mind yet. This is just typical Bixlow being an asshole."

"Laxus is right, as always." Freed landed on the rooftop behind Laxus. "Bixlow is just having some fun. Ever usually deals with him when he gets like this."

"The party's over, Bix. Time to pick up the trash." Evergreen lazily glided above him. "Fairy Bomb!"

"NOOOOO!" Bixlow yelled from inside the dust and smoke. "Just kidding, Ever! You missed!" He peeked his head from out of the hole in the ground with his tongue hanging out of his mouth.

"I didn't miss. I meant to catch you in that hole." She lowered her glasses and looked straight into his eyes just as he was peeking out of the hole. His body froze with that wide grin and his tongue hanging out.

"Good job, Ever!" Elfman used his beast arm to pull the stone statue out of the hole.

Laki, the wood-make mage finally caught up to help, "Wood Make: Wagon!"

Elfman placed Bixlow on the wagon and started pulling it. "Lets get him back to the guild."

**In the hall of Blue Pegasus:**

"I don't know about this, Mr. Doranbolt. I'm still tired and I've never tried this before" Wendy's small innocent voice rang down the hallway.

"I promise it will be good. It will make you feel better and you will recover your energy faster" Doranbolt cooed softly to Wendy.

"Well, okay then" Wendy gave in.

Carla froze mid-air. She couldn't believe what she just heard, but she couldn't figure out which door was the guest bedroom. She started wiggling door knobs, but most were locked.

"Ow!"

"Are you okay? How is it?"

"Mmm…you're right. It's good."

Carla found the door where the voices were coming from and she kicked the door open. "GET AWAY FROM HER, PEDOPHILE!"

Wendy and Doranbolt looked dumbfounded as they sat across from each other at a dining table with bowls of steaming hot soup in front of them.

"Is your cat always this rude?" Doranbolt crossed his arms over his chest.

Wendy's face was bright red "Carla…the door was open, you didn't have to break it. And do you really think I would do that?"

Carla lowered her head in shame. She had never felt this embarrassed before.

**Blue Pegasus main hall:**

"Thank you, Virgo. It only took a few hours, but we managed to change everyone." Lucy plopped down on a bar seat next to a fully naked Gray.

"You're welcome, Princess. Call me if you need me again." Virgo nodded and disappeared.

"Gray, you should at least put some underwear on before sitting there…" Lucy rolled her eyes.

"Erza!" Wendy waved as she run into the main hall with Carla. "We have a call from Master!"

Doranbolt carried the communications lacrama with an image of Makarov staring back at them.

"Children! I'll get right to the point. Bixlow began to show symptoms of the Blue Pegasus disease so we captured him and quarantined him here in the guild. This could only mean that the disease is actually contagious and it can spread to the general population." Makarov sighed before continuing "Freed has a hypothesis of how the disease is spread."

Freed's image appeared on the communications lacrama, "I believe I have figured out the nature of the disease. While we were rounding up the members of Blue Pegasus, Bixlow snuck away and had sex one of the female members. Now he is the only one that is showing symptoms."

Wendy gasped "That means…the disease is transmitted through sexual contact…"

"What does that mean?" Natsu scratched his head.

"Dumbass! It means the disease is an STD!" Gray scrambled to put some underwear on.

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Okay, The Evil Stick must admit that _maybe_ the detailed sponge bath went a _little_ too far. But to be fair, a clear warning was posted in the summary.

**BTW, the profanity filter has been turned off** for reviews so if you wish to fully express yourself over the nightmares that you will undoubtedly be having then feel free to flame in the review!


	4. Itchy! Itchy! Itchy! Burn! Burn!

The Evil stick had to change the summary a bit. There was a clear warning about a shirtless Master Bob, but it is only fair to warn about the nature of the disease and the implied promiscuity. It's a little raunchy for young teens…

Thanks to Hiro Mashima again for his creative genius, whom I have no affiliation with whatsoever!

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**Itchy! Itchy! Itchy! Burn! Burn!**

"FUCK THAT!" Gajeel stomped around the Fairy Tail guild and slammed his fists on the table that Jet and Droy were sitting at, effectively scaring them half to death.

"There's no need for the theatrics, Gajeel" Master took a calm sip of his beer. "Just sniff them out so Levy and Freed can quarantine them. Then we'll have to find a way to transport them to receive treatment from Wendy."

"Why am I the one who has to track the women that Seith Freak went to have lunch with?!" Gajeel pointed an angry finger to the stone statue of Bickslow.

"We have to make sure that this disease doesn't spread any further and our other two Dragon Slayers are at Blue Pegasus right now. You are the only one who can track them." Pantherlily stood on the bar next to the Master peeling a kiwi.

"I'm sure they won't be nearly as hard to quarantine as Bickslow was. All we have to do is explain to them that their life is in danger and they will most likely come along willingly." Levy smiled sweetly "You just point them out and I'll be the one to talk to them. If they become difficult, Freed will catch them in runes."

Gajeel crossed his arms over his chest "Fine."

"Levy!" Jet and Droy wailed at the touching moment between the two.

Freed approached Levy and Gajeel, "I've just finished setting up the runes that confines Bickslow to the wagon he is in. I found it convenient so I asked Laki to make another one to transport the women." He gestured to a larger wooden wagon.

Gajeel growled "I'm not pulling that thing with those diseased women behind me."

"Pardon, I can take care of that for you," Reedus lifted his shirt and happily painted two purple warthogs on his belly. Two large boars appeared in front of the wagon already strapped and attached to the cart.

Gajeel nodded at Reedus and looked to the others, "Lets go while the scents still linger."

Freed thanked Reedus and followed Gajeel with the wagon being pulled by the large warthogs.

"Thank you, Reedus!" Levy waved as she after the others.

Laxus walked up behind Reedus, "Can you make a pig for Bickslow's wagon, too? I don't want to haul his ass all the way to Blue Pegasus."

"Oui!" Reedus lifted his shirt and drew one more warthog that appeared in front of Bickslow's cart.

Laxus gave a short nod to Reedus "Thanks." He hated those pigs, but they were useful sometimes.

"I can manage the guild myself, Mira. Don't forget that I took good care of everything during those 7 years you guys were gone." Kinana was looking at the long list of duties on the to-do list that Mira gave her.

"Mira, I think you and Laxus should get going now. Don't worry about the bar, it's Blue Pegasus that you should be worrying about." The Master gestured to Kinana for a mug refill.

"Yes, Master. Listen to Kinana and don't make me angry when I'm away." Mira picked up her bag and placed it on Bickslow's wagon.

"Are you ready to go now?" Laxus gruffly asked.

Mira giggled, "Almost." She pointed to the stone statue of Bickslow.

Laxus grumbled. "Ever!" he called over to the table where Evergreen sat with Elfman. "Can you unstone him now?"

"Sure, Laxus. I won't let Bix stay like that forever, even though he looks better as a statue." She pulled out her fan and started fanning herself as Bickslow unpetrified.

Bickslow looked around at his surroundings as he scratched at his belly, "Hey! I don't want to be behind this pig the whole way!"

As if on cue, the pig ripped a gnarly fart that gagged Bickslow.

"You should have thought of that before you made us chase you through Magnolia," Evergreen snickered behind her fan.

Elfman nodded in agreement, "Take it like a man!"

"Itchy! Itchy! Itchy! Burn! Burn!" the wooden souls floated around Bickslow as he continued to scratch his body.

"Lets go. I want to make this trip short." Laxus walked out the front doors with the warthog pulling Bickslow behind it.

Mira waved to her guild mates as she left "Don't worry, I'll take good care of our allies!"

The rest of the Fairies eagerly watched as Laxus and Mira disappeared down the road.

"Place all bets here!" Cana waved cash in the air, "How many Blue Pegasus members will die and how will they meet their end?!"

"800 jewel says Ichiya will be killed by Erza!"

"500 jewel for Hibiki dying by STD!"

"300 jewel on Demon Mira killing Jenny Realight!"

"600 jewel on Laxus electrocuting at least 2 of the Trimens!"

*SLAM* The Master slammed an enlarged fist on the bar top.

Everyone paused as they saw a very serious Makarov standing on the bar.

"1000 jewel says they all will burn to death when Natsu sets the building on fire!" the short Master held his cash up in the air and everyone continued trying to profit on their own predictions.

**At Blue Pegasus:**

"Are you trying to freeze them to death, Jerk?" Natsu was looking down on the patients who were shivering on hard ice cots.

"The ice cots are keeping their temperatures down and I wouldn't have needed to make them if some asshole didn't burn all of the cots in the first place!" Gray shoved his forehead against Natsu's.

"Erza told me to burn all of the dirty cots!"

"She didn't mean the ones that were being used!"

"Enough!" Erza slammed their heads together. "Get back to work!"

"It's alright, guys. I can call out Aries and she would be happy to make wool beds for everyone." Lucy smiled as she pulled out her key. "Open! Gate of the ram!"

* Poof * A black and blue Aries appeared sprawled out on the floor scratching at her open sores. Patches of wool had fallen out where sores had formed and her eyes were bloodshot from the lack of sleep.

"ARIES?!" The group stared at her sad state.

"I-I'm s-sorry," she weakly apologized.

"The disease is spreading through the celestial world, too? Is there anyone else sick?" Lucy began to panic.

"Just me and Loke are sick, Princess" Aries whispered in a weak voice.

Lucy grumbled "Figures. Why did I even ask?"

"I don't get it. How does a spirit catch a STD?" Natsu scratched his head.

"You're such a dumbass. STD is short for sexually transmitted disease." Grey checked Aries head for a temperature and made a curved, forehead-sized ice pack for her head.

"I still don't get it…" Natsu sat cross-legged on the ground mulling over the situation.

"Don't hurt yourself," Grey rolled his eyes at Natsu.

"We mustn't focus on how they all got infected," Erza paused and then shivered at the thought. "We must focus on their care and continue supporting Wendy as she heals them."

"Speaking of Wendy, she's handling the situation like a champ." Lucy looked over to where Wendy was healing the black and blue Master Bob. Lucy got a little queasy remembering the sponge bath.

"Wendy! Can you come heal Aries real quick?" Erza yelled over to the young girl who was talking to a semi-conscious Master Bob.

As soon as Wendy was done she came over and healed Aries without question. "There. Just send her back to the spirit world so she can recover her strength. It should only take about 10 Earth minutes."

"Thank you, Wendy" Lucy closed Aries' gate right after she warned her not to have sex with Loke until this mission is concluded.

"Are you gonna call out Loke so I can heal him too?" Wendy asked with a concerned voice.

Erza placed a hand on her small shoulder "You're handing this mission as a mature adult would. I'll make sure to mention this to Master when we are through."

Wendy beamed at the compliment, but her happy moment was short lived.

"Open, gate of the Lion!"

*poof* Loke appeared on the floor in shades of black and red. He was only in boxers so the extent of his injuries were seen by every one. He had gangrene in both feet, blood was seeping out of his eyes and ears and his swollen black tongue was hanging out of his mouth as he wheezed shallow breaths. Bone was exposed on the back of his hands, his elbow, and chin from the loss of tissue. Everyone watched in horror as he started hacking and coughed up a bloody glob of puss.

"Gross," Grey cringed at the sight of his friend.

"He stinks…" Natsu held a hand to his nose.

"If a human had those injuries, they would surely be dead," Erza stared wide-eyed at her former comrade.

Wendy held a straight face and began the healing process, "He may have only caught the disease this afternoon in our timeline, but somehow the disease works faster in the stellar world. Since he's a spirit, the disease won't kill him, but his health will continue to deteriorate if he's not healed."

"He's going to need a sponge bath, Lucy!" Happy exclaimed while floating above the celestial mage who was trying to hold down the bile rising in her throat.

"There, the virus is out of his system and I healed his lungs. He's still going to need a few days in the celestial world to fully heal. Try to keep his gate closed, Lucy." Wendy wiped the sweat off her brow. She would never complain, but healing Loke took a lot of her magic energy.

"Easier said than done. If he knew we were at Blue Pegasus then he would open his own gate so he could hang out with his old friends. Don't be surprised if we see him again in just a few hours." Lucy swung her golden key and Loke phased back into the stellar world.

"Wendy, how many more can you do?" Doranbolt asked as he walked up to her holding a clipboard. "There are about 9 more critical patients that need immediate attention and 17 more that can wait about 4 hours or more."

"You're pushing her too hard! She's just a little girl!" Carla hovered over his shoulder making demands to back off of her Dragon Slayer.

"Could you please ask your cat to stop following me and to please stop yelling in my ear?" he gave Carla a dirty look while tapping the pen against the clipboard.

"Mr. Doranbolt is making sure that the most severe cases are being taken care of first so there is no casualties," Wendy softly explained to her overprotective exceed. Wendy looked to Doranbolt, "I'm sure I can heal the most critical and then I will take a 3 hour break."

Doranbolt smiled at Wendy's determination "Okay, the ones that need to be healed first are over here." He draped his arm over her tiny shoulders and gave Carla a smug look as he escorted her to the next patients.

"HEY! WATCH YOUR HAN-!" Wendy started yelling but Erza grabbed her tail before she could follow.

"I know your worried about Wendy, but she's fine for now. I need you and Happy to go to the guild kitchen to make her some diner so she will recover her magic energy quicker." Erza turned toward the others "Lucy, call out Aries again and make cotton cots for the patients who are on ice."

**Blue Pegasus Kitchen:**

"I have some fish in my backpack," Happy announced as he and Carla made their way to the kitchen.

"A few sandwiches and some fresh air would be best for Wendy to help her recover," Carla pouted as she floated.

As they two exceeds open the large doors to the kitchen they were surprised to see Eve in the kitchen making out with another guild member. They stopped making out and eyed the two exceeds.

The female guild member bounded over to Happy cooing "Oh! Such a cute kitty cat!" She pinched his cheeks and kissed him on the cheek.

"White Cat," Eve took her tiny hand. "You are more luscious and pure than the first snowflake of the winter season."

"Back off, Whore! Your lesions still haven't healed! And you two were just swapping spit so why are you flirting with us?" Carla turned up her nose.

Happy used his paws to push his head out of the woman's bandaged cleavage, "We are here to get food for Wendy so she can keep her magic strength up."

The woman released him, "Well, in that case. We'll help you make her a wholesome soup."

"And I will make her a tea that restores energy," Eve started digging through the cupboards.

**Back in the Blue Pegasus guild hall:**

Lucy and Aries finished shaping the last of the cotton beds as Erza and Grey lifted patients from their ice cots onto their pink cotton beds. Natsu grumbled as he dragged the melting ice cots outside to destroy.

"Thank you, Aries. Do you need me to change your bandages before your gate is closed?" Lucy asked her recovering spirit.

"Sorry, Princess. Virgo has been taking care of me and Loke as we heal. I'm sorry," the celestial spirit apologized sadly.

"It's okay, just focus on healing now." Lucy closed the gate and leaned against the wall "Ugh, I'm exhausted from opening and closing all of these gates."

Erza nodded at the blond, "Take a rest, Lucy. Grey, Natsu, you're on bandage duty. Starting with this patient," she pointed to the patient at the end of the line.

Grey and Natsu headed to the patient that Erza pointed at.

"Great, we now we have to change the bandages on an old lady," Grey grumbled as he started removing the old, bloody bandages from the woman's leg.

Natsu sniffed and stiffened, "Th-this isn't an old lady…"

"Ooooh, don't you boys look scrumptious," Master Bob's voice rang out and gave the two rivals chills to the bone. "Make sure you handle every appendage with care," he winked at the boys.

Just as they were both about to turn and run, they both felt an armored hand roughly grasp their shoulder.

"Just where do you two think you are going?" Erza tightened her grip on each of their shoulders. "You heard the man, change every bandage carefully."

Master Bob giggled in delight as Natsu and Grey started unwrapping his soaked bandages with shaking hands.

* * *

Let this be a lesson. **ALWAYS USE PROTECTION!** The Evil Stick is aware that the time difference between the celestial world and earth is skewed, but it was just to spice up the story. There really isn't an STD the kills people within 48 hours either. **REVIEW** and follow this story, or better yet, **FOLLOW The Evil Stick! **While you're waiting for the next chapter: _"Recurrence,"_ check out my short stories.


	5. Recovery

Hiro Mashima is the best for creating such an unbelievably awesome array of characters.

The Evil Stick announced that this chapter would be "Recurrence" but that had changed. Recovery will come first, then Recurrence. Last chapter, The Evil Stick started off with Gajeel having the first line. That was fun so we start off this chapter with angry Gajeel again.

* * *

**Recovery**

"I FUCKING HATE THIS JOB!" Gajeel kicked the wooden wagon which made the three women inside of it cry louder and whimper in fear. "SHUT UP!"

"Gajeel! You're scaring them!" Levy placed herself between the women and the dragon slayer in a sad attempt to diffuse the situation.

"THEIR CRYING IS ANNOYING! THEY THEM SMELL LIKE PLAGUE AND THAT SEITH FREAK AND THAT SLUTTY LION SPIRIT!" Gajeel pointed his finger in one women's face, "AND YOU SMELL LIKE BOTH OF THEM! WHO HAS AN ORGY FOR LUNCH?! WHO DOES THAT?!"

The woman he pointed out started wailing in remorse over her actions while scratching her thigh. The other women continued to cry and scratch themselves along with her. This was not the treatment they had in mind when that sweet, petite, blue haired girl talked them into the wagon.

"SHUT THE FUCK UP! IT'S BAD ENOUGH I HAVE TO SMELL YOU! I DON'T WANT TO HEAR YOU TOO! WHEN WE GET TO THE GUILD I'M GOING TO HAVE THAT RAIN WOMAN SPRAY YOU OFF WITH THE CANAL WATER!" Gajeel use his iron fist and punched the wagon, cracking the frame of it.

The two Warthogs started squealing in fright and pulled the broken wagon so the front axle came out from under the frame. The women screamed in terror while the pigs ran away with the front axle dragging behind them. One women stood up and tried to run away but was knocked out from the impact of running into the rune barriers that surrounded the broken wagon.

"Gajeel! They don't need this right now! You're making this job harder than it is!" Levy stomped her dainty foot on the ground, but no one seemed to hear it over the loud cries.

Freed sighed. He knew this wasn't going to go smoothly if Gajeel came along, "We got all the women into the wagon and were on our way back to the guild but your temper tantrum has delayed us."

Gajeel grumbled to himself and crossed his arms over his chest. They had successfully rounded up the women for quarantine and were going back to the guild when he lost his temper over the smells and sounds that the women were emitting. He shot an angry glare to the women and growled. The two conscious women huddled closer together and shivered in fear.

"Are you done terrorizing the women?" Freed calmly asked.

"For now…" Gajeel growled out through his clenched teeth.

"Good. Since you broke the wagon and chased off the pigs, it would only be fair that you haul the broken the wagon back to the guild. Hopefully Reedus and Laki are still there so they can make us a new wagon and new pigs." Freed calmly turned and continued walking toward the guild.

Gajeel snorted as he turned to the broken wagon and made a large iron hook from of his arm and started towing it rather roughly back to the guild.

Levy walked beside the wagon apologizing to the women profusely about Gajeel's behavior and promising to make sure that they are fully healed by tomorrow evening.

**In the kitchen of Blue Pegasus:**

Ren pinned Carla tightly against his chest trying to pet her in places that made her feel uncomfortable, "Most kitties like to be scratched at the base of their tail."

"Let me go! Where did you come from anyways?!" She screamed many obscenities as she struggled to escape his grasp.

"Maybe you're the type of kitty that purrs for a sensual tummy rub." He started rubbing her stomach.

"I'm not a cat, Pervert! How dare you touch a lady against her will!" Her tiny teeth clamped down on his hand tearing away flesh. He dropped her, but she gracefully landed on her feet and straightened out her dress. "Hmph! My Master will hear about this."

"It's alright, I like frisky cats," Ren grabbed some paper towels and held it against his wound.

Happy laid on his back while a female Blue Pegasus member rubbed his belly. "I don't mind it at all." He munched at his fish while the lady cooed at him.

Eve stirred the contents of Wendy's soup and poured the tea. "White Cat, can you take this to Wendy? Tell her that her dinner is ready to be served."

Carla picked up the cup of tea and started floating out of the kitchen when the door swung open to hit her hard in the face. The impact threw her against the wall and then she was brutally crushed between the wall and the door.

"I'm so sorry, Kitty." Doranbolt gave Wendy a sympathetic look, "Wendy, your cat was standing behind the door and I accidentally hit it."

"Liar!" Carla shook her skirt that was soaked in hot tea, "I saw you look right at me through the door window! You did that on purpose!"

Wendy picked up Carla and wiped the tea off of her face, "He wouldn't do that on purpose, Carla. You're always accusing him of something." She set the exceed on the counter and sniffed the air, "It smells good in here."

Carla narrowed her eyes at Doranbolt as he passed by with a smirk on his face. She was so focused on him that she didn't see Ren and Eve come up from behind her. "We'll clean you up, Kitty!"

Eve grabbed her arms while Ren quickly slipped off her tiny dress and dropped it on the floor. They started rubbing her wet fur with hand towels leaving her fur sticking up in all directions and full of static.

"STOP!" Carla struggled against them and they rubbed her everywhere with the towels. "RAPE!"

The kitchen went silent.

Eve and Ren paused "Uh, we are just trying to clean you up, White Kitty." They stiffened as a sword was held to each of their necks.

"W-we pr-promise, Ezra. It wasn't like that. We would never do anything like that." They shook in fear as she gave them a death glare.

Carla held a towel over her naked exceed body, shaking from the experience.

Doranbolt put a hand on Erza's shoulder, "It's alright, Erza. We were all in here when it happened. Eve and Ren were just trying to help her clean up after she spilled hot tea all over herself. The cat just freaked out a little."

"WH-WHAT?!" Carla sputtered as she heard Doranbolt make light of the situation. "Wendy! Tell Erza what happened!"

Wendy just shrank into her seat, "Well, you did spill steaming hot tea on your clothes. Eve and Ren were just trying to help."

Carla stood there speechless and still shaking. "B-but, my clothes… I felt so… violated… and I'm still naked… in front of everyone."

Happy didn't understand what was going on, "Carla! You can wear my backpack so you don't feel naked anymore! I don't care about wearing people clothes."

Carla's eyes widened at Happy's innocent statement. He basically just insinuated that exceeds don't need to wear clothing which further implies that it meant nothing at all when the two Trimens tore off her clothes and man-handled her.

Erza requipped back into her nurses uniform, looking disappointed in the exceed. "Carla, you don't yell 'rape' unless someone is in grave danger. I don't even think it's possible for humans to rape exceeds…" she sighed as she left the kitchen.

There was an awkward silence after Erza left the kitchen.

Carla's face went from shock and horror to pure anger. She slowly turned toward Doranbolt who was rubbing a blushing Wendy's back. "It's not your fault, Wendy" he softly said to her.

"YOU!" Carla's face was red with anger. "GET YOUR HANDS OFF HER! I CAN'T BELEIV-!"

"Bath time!" Ren and Eve sang as they tore the towel away from Carla's body and forced her into a sink filled with soapy water. "Don't worry, White Cat, we'll make sure to wash every nook and cranny very well!"

**Back in the main hall of Blue Pegasus:**

As Erza left the kitchen she looked in all directions as well as under the tables and behind the bar. She let out a sigh of relief. Ichiya must still be resting.

"Are you looking for your boyfriend, Sweetie?" a bandaged Master Bob was propped up on his pink cotton cot watching a naked Gray monitor temperatures.

Erza rolled her eyes "Grey!" She yelled across the guild's main hall, "Your clothes!"

Grey looked down at his exposed package "Oh, sh-!" he scrambled to find his underwear.

"Oh, Poo!" Master Bob pouted, "You ruined my eye candy."

Erza smiled down at Master Bob, "Don't worry, I'm sure he'll be naked again soon."

*sniff sniff* "Men… I detect the parfume of a beautiful scarlet flower in full bloom." Ichiya was laying on the floor looking up Erza's nurse's uniform.

Erza stiffened. She regretted yelling across the guild at Grey. "Ichiya! I'm on a very important mission! It's imperative that you don't get in my way right now!" The scarlet haired mage requipped into her Purgatory Armor and swung her spiked mace at him.

"Meeeeeeen" Ichiya went through one of the walls again.

"You really shouldn't beat on your boyfriend like that. Abuse is a sign of an unhealthy relationship," Master Bob continued to watch Grey as he monitored the patients while naked.

"He isn't my boyfriend!" Erza turned red with anger and embarrassment.

Master Bob giggled, "Hmm… so shy, Titania."

Natsu came running into the building with ash smeared on his face. "Hey Guys! Laxus and Mira have finally arrived with Bickslow!"

Lucy was resting on one of Aries' cots reading a Sorcerer Weekly. "Finally. I can get some help with the domestic work."

Wendy must have heard Natsu from the kitchen because Doranbolt teleported into the main guild hall carrying her bridal style.

"That's great! I just ate and the tea Eve made for me helped regain some strength so I can heal Bickslow and maybe one more Blue Pegasus member!" Wendy happily exclaimed.

Erza turned to Doranbolt, "Sir, can you round up the healed Blue Pegasus members? Laxus is going to make an announcement that they need to hear. Tell them to meet us in the dining hall in 30 minutes."

Doranbolt nodded and headed toward the dormitory wing to round up the Blue Pegasus members.

*oink oink* The guild doors opened to reveal a smiling Mira and a pissed off Laxus with Bickslow sitting in the wagon.

"That's one of Reedus' pigs! I recognize the smell from anywhere! I love those things!" Natsu patted the top of the boar's head.

The pig slowly pulled Bickslow into the main hall. Lucy gasped at Bickslow's condition and her eyes widened in horror. He wasn't wearing his signature mask so his wide bloodshot eyes looked wild while he was growling and foaming at the mouth. His black and blue face had open wounds that were oozing green puss. When she got close to the wagon he lunged at her in a feral manner, but was blocked by the runes that confined him to the wagon. Then he started growling and scratching at the invisible wall trying to get to her. Foam poured out of his mouth as he bared his sharp teeth at her.

"Oh, no. Poor Bickslow has gone insane…" Lucy's eyes started tearing up with the thought of her comrade never recovering from the massive brain damage.

"Knock it of, Bix," Laxus turned away so no one would catch him smirking.

"RAHAHAHA! Just kidding, Cosplay Girl! You should have seen your face!" Bickslow wiped the foam from his mouth and his tongue came out for a wide grin.

Mira giggled, "So that's why he asked for that latte with extra foam."

Lucy placed her hands on her hips. "You're a jerk!" she screamed in a smiling Bickslow's face.

Wendy ran up to Bickslow, "Are you ready to get healed, Bickslow?"

Bickslow nodded as he stayed still while Wendy worked her magic. As soon as he was cured, the runes were dispelled.

"Thanks, Kid!" Bickslow hopped off the wagon and patted her head before he ran toward the hall to the dormitory, "RAHAHAHA!"

"Are we done with this stupid wagon?" Laxus asked impatiently.

Erza nodded her head at him, "If the women he met for lunch are coming in a different wagon then we are done with it."

*SQUEAL* A bolt of lightning came up from the ground and killed the unsuspecting warthog.

"I hated smelling that thing on the way here," Laxus made his way to the bar.

"Are you gonna eat that, Laxus?!" Natsu asked with fire drooling out of his mouth.

"Nope," he waved his hand to dismiss the subject.

"Alright!" Just as Natsu was going to pounce on the pig's dead carcass, Erza stopped him.

"Help Mira take it to the kitchen so you can help her prepare it for dinner," Erza commanded.

"I can help with the cooking," Lucy pulled out a golden key. "Open, gate of the crab!"

With a flash of gold light, Cancer was kneeling in front of Erza with a dozen roses. "I snip-snip-ed these for you from the celestial garden, ebi."

Erza smiled and took the flowers, "Thank you, Cancer. Your flowers are always lovely. Make sure the meal in ready and on the table in 20 minutes." She turned on her heel and walked away smelling the roses leaving Cancer feeling rejected.

Grey watched the exchange and laughed, "Hey, you just gave Erza flowers and she didn't kick you through a wall. That's amazing."

"Is that good, snip-snip?" Cancer looked hopeful.

"Yeah, I'd say that was a good sign," Lucy smiled at her blushing spirit.

"Hey, Giant Crab! Those vegetables aren't going to chop themselves!" Natsu propped the giant purple pig over his shoulder and headed to the kitchen.

**20 minutes later in the Blue Pegasus dining hall:**

Everyone sat at the massive table that could accommodate up to 50 guests. The large, fire-roasted, boar sat in the middle of the long table with an apple in it's mouths There were large plates of roasted vegetables and roasted potatoes that went down the center.

Master Bob tapped his glass to get everyone's attention. "On behalf of Blue Pegasus, we would like to thank Fairy Tail and the Magic Council for getting us through the curse that was put on us yesterday morning. Doranbolt informed me that there are about 9 more patients to heal and Wendy believes she could have them cured by midnight. We would also like to thank the cute fire dragon for roasting all of our food on such short notice." Master Bob paused to wink at Natsu. Grey snickered as Master Bob continued, "We also like to thank the cute ice maker for keeping us cool and then making us hot all over again…"

"Your welcome," Laxus growled out through his teeth as he stood to address the hall. "We need to get down to business. This disease is serious and I am here to make sure that it doesn't spread to the general public otherwise it would look bad on both Blue Pegasus and Fairy Tail. Therefore, we are extending the quarantine period until 2 days from now."

Gasps filled the dining halls.

"I have to visit my girlfriend at Lamia Scale tomorrow!" Ren yelled out.

"I have a photo shoot in the morning!" Jenny protested. "You planned this, didn't you, Mira!"

"But the disease in non-contagious!" a random member voiced.

Master Bob stood up and yelled "SILENCE!" His normal crescent slits opened up into angry oval shaped eyes. "That is no way to treat a guest at the dinner table! Especially one so handsome…"

"As I was saying," Laxus interjected, "it's important that you are aware of the nature of the disease. It is a highly contagious STD and it is easily spread through sexual contact."

"Oh, my…" Master Bob delicately placed a hand on his chest.

The room fell silent. Faces started to glow red with embarrassment and the members of Blue Pegasus started exchanging nervous glances.

"Men…"

Laxus continued, "So, if everyone could abstain from sex for the next few days so the disease can go extinct, it would make everyone's lives easier for the next few days. Especially Wendy, the outbreak was especially hard on her."

Erza stood up, "I don't know if you guys realize this, but you all need to consider a major lifestyle change! This deadly STD spread through your entire guild in less than a day and put everyone's lives in danger! Have any of you people ever heard of a condom?!"

The room stayed quiet while everyone continued to exchange nervous glances.

"Um, excuse me…" one member of Blue Pegasus spoke to Wendy, "if we… say someone had… uh… sexual contact… with, uh… some one who hasn't been, uh… cured… then…?"

Wendy turned bright red with the question that was directed at her.

"UGH!" Laxus pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration. "Would everyone who has had sex since being cured, please raise you hand so we have an idea of who may experience a recurrence of the STD?"

Grey choked on his drink, Lucy's eyes popped out of her eye sockets, Mira smiled, Erza seethed, and Natsu continued to sneak extra food from the table as every member of Blue Pegasus slowly raised their hand with a blush on their face.

"Oh, my…" Master Bob delicately placed his hand on his cheek while his other hand was held in the air.

Laxus sighed and then his eyebrow twitched as he noticed Bickslow sitting next to him smiling with his tongue out and his hand raised up high with pride.

Wendy slumped in her chair as the tears in her eyes threatened to fall. Doranbolt wrapped his arm around her shoulders and held her close for comfort.

"You're sitting too close to her!" a frizzy Carla yelled from the other side of where Wendy was sitting.

For Wendy, tonight was going to be a very long night and the exhausting mission will repeat itself tomorrow.

* * *

So, is Doranbolt really attracted to Wendy, or not? **The Evil Stick doesn't know! **That's why it's fun to write in those "maybe so" scenes! The Evil Stick also has no idea where the feud between Carla and Doranbolt will go since it's just something that has been developing as the story goes on. Poor Carla… even though she is extremely annoying.

Was Carla justified in yelling rape or was she once again overreacting? **REVIEW** and tell me what you think!


	6. Recurrence

First off, The Evil Stick would like to give a big thanks to XXinsidemymindXX for help correcting some mistakes from the previous chapters! Also, a big thank you to Hiro Mashima, the owner and creator of Fairy Tail!

* * *

**Recurrence**

Erza stood in front of the dinner table and commanded everyone's attention. "Tomorrow afternoon there will be a mandatory sex-ed course! Everyone will attend. There will be no excuses and no exceptions!"

"Sex-ed! Sex-ed! Sex-ed! Sex-ed! Sex-ed!" Bickslow's wooden dolls danced around Erza's head as the rest of the people sitting at the large dining table grumbled.

"ARE WE CLEAR?!" Erza put her hands on her hips.

"Mandatory. Mandatory. Mandatory. Mandatory. Mandatory." The wooden dolls chanted as everyone in the room nodded their heads for the intimidating red head.

"Good." Erza nodded her head at the people in front of her. "If you are finished eating then you are excused from the dinner table. All Blue Pegasus members need to get their rest."

Most members of Blue Pegasus shuffled out of the dining area while offering their apologies to a bright red Wendy on their way out.

"Hey, Luce? Why is everyone sick again? I thought the disease wasn't contagious?" Natsu scratched his head in wonder.

Lucy sighed, she didn't want to be the one to explain it to Natsu.

"You're such a dumbass," Gray unknowingly peeled off his shirt like it was second nature to him.

"You're the one that just sat down naked next to Master Bob," Natsu snickered at his ice partner.

Gray slowly turned his head to see if it was true and unfortunately his eyes met the blushing Master's eyes. He jumped up and started looking for his clothes.

Master Bob's eyes probed Grey's backside as he bent over to grab his underwear off of the floor, "Oh, my stars… so delicious…"

Natsu happily got down on his hands and knees to take a peek, "What's delicious? Did someone drop food on the floor?" The dragon slayer put his face closer to the ice mage's naked butt looking for more food while Master Bob fell out of his chair at the sight.

"What the hell are you doing, Flame Tard?!" Gray turned around planted a fist in Natsu's face which initiated a fight across the table from the others

"Erza?" Wendy shyly asked her teammate, "Do I have to attend the sex-ed class?"

"I said there will be no exceptions!" Erza firmly stated.

Wendy's face got a little brighter.

"It's okay, Wendy." Doranbolt rubbed her back soothingly, "I'll be here with you."

Carla stared at him slowly rubbing Wendy's back, "Excuse me, Mr. Doranbolt, could you please pass the salt?"

Doranbolt blinked at Carla's civil tone, "Uh, sure." He slowly reached for the salt in the middle of the table.

*SINGE* Flames rolled across the table and scorched the councilmember's hand when Gray ducked out of the way from Natsu's fire breathe.

"ARGH!" Doranbolt clutched his hand and glared at the future-seeing exceed. He knew she had the power of premonition, but he never imagined she could use it against him in this fashion.

"What are the chances of that happening?" Carla ominously replied with a smirk before she slipped a strip of roasted pork in her mouth and chewed happily.

Erza walked over to Gray and Natsu and slammed their heads together, effectively ending their fight.

"Dinner is over!" Erza barked to the dinner guests. "Carla, take Wendy to her room so she can rest! Lucy and Mira wash the dishes! Bickslow, clear the table and clean the floors! Grey, monitor the rest of the patients and keep their temperature down! Natsu, Happy, burn the rest of the unused cots and medical waste!"

As everyone left to get started on their jobs, Laxus stood up. "Master Bob, we have a lot of paperwork to do."

"If you want some alone time, all you have to do is ask." Master Bob swayed flirtatiously.

The air in the room filled with static as small flashes of lightning erupted from Laxus' body, "Don't try my patience."

Master Bob blushed and left the room quietly before angering the powerful lightning mage. Laxus followed with his arms crossed against his chest.

Erza turned to Doranbolt, who had his burnt hand in the water pitcher. She requipped into her nurses uniform and held out bandages. "Well, Wendy is low on magic so it looks like I'm going to have to take care of that for you."

Doranbolt shivered, he knew that Erza wasn't very gentle when caring for her patients Sometimes she caused more harm than good. He had underestimated the prissy cat and pushed her too far. Now he had to watch his back around Carla since he realized how dangerous she could actually be.

**A few hours later, in the Blue Pegasus main hall:**

"What the fuck is this?!" Laxus stared down at the dying exceed with a look of disgust on his face. "How the hell did this cat catch the STD?!"

"Are you sure you want to know?" Gray shrugged. Having monitored the patients for the entire day, he was well aware of the exceed's condition. "It's time to get Wendy. I can't keep Nichiya's temperature down any longer."

Laxus shook off his shock and left to find Wendy, "This is ridiculous."

"Ridiculous, Ridiculous, Ridiculous, Ridiculous, Ridiculous!" Five possessed mops chimed while wiping the floors.

"Scrub every last stain on the floor, Babies!" Bickslow sprayed cleaner on Lucy's vomit stain on the floor.

"Men…Will my handsome cat ever smell the sweet parfume of recovery?" Ichiya wiped away a tear and held the hand of his exceed counterpart.

Grey sighed, "I'm sure he will, Ichiya."

"Men… you might not want to sit down on the dirty cots without clothes…" Ichiya pointed at the stains on the cot.

"Oh, shit!" The ice mage jumped up and started looking for his clothes.

"Hey, guys!" Natsu yelled from the door, "The others are here! I smelled Gajeel's metal from a mile away!"

"Good timing." Grey mentioned as he was putting on his shirt. "Laxus is getting Wendy so she could heal the rest of the patients."

**In the hallways of Blue Pegasus:**

Laxus strolled down the hall with visible static electricity coming off of his body. This was the best way to keep them away. If he knew that he would be hit on by multiple women and one male on his way to Wendy's room then he would have told Natsu to go get her. He smirked while thinking about the women being accidentally burned by the naïve Salamander. He was so caught up in his thoughts, he didn't notice walking past a former colleague of his.

"Yo, Laxus! Is that how you treat your colleagues? You just walk by with an evil look on your face and ignore them?" A familiar voice rang out.

Laxus turned around to the familiar voice and saw Loke standing there with his arms around two women. All three of them had their hair messed up from the static electricity in the hallways.

"Annoying Lion. Do you have any idea of the mess you and Bix made in Magnolia?" Laxus let out a little more electricity to show his annoyance.

Loke readjusted his glasses with confidence, "My apologies. I didn't know there was a health issue at the time." The women wriggled out of his arms and ran down the hall away from the scary lightning mage. "Now look what you did, you scared away the girls."

Laxus turned and started walking again, "It's better that they ran, we are expecting a recurrence of the disease tomorrow."

It stayed quiet and Laxus realized that Loke stopped following him so he turned around again to see what he was up to. Loke was frozen in his steps, "Re-recurrence…?"

Laxus' eyes narrowed, "You already slept with them, didn't you?"

Loke started sweating a bit, "A gentleman never kisses and tells…" Loke readjusted his tie and started following Laxus.

"I can't wait until this shitty job is over." He stopped at a door that had the strongest scent of the sky dragon slayer and knocked.

The door opened to reveal a sleepy Carla. She rubbed her eyes, "Laxus! The members of Blue Pegasus are using too much of Wendy's magic! She's just a little girl so she shouldn't have to deal with their ridiculous STD's or that old creepy perv, Doranbol-"

"Just get Wendy out to the main hall so the others won't die." Laxus stated, very bored with Carla's rant. "This is Wendy's first S-Class mission so it's normal that she's so fatigued."

Carla watched as Laxus walked away. A few members of Blue Pegasus walking down the hall cowered as he passed them. The angry exceed slammed the door shut.

"Wendy… it's time to wake u- WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?!" Carla's fur raised on her back out of surprise and anger.

Wendy was sitting on the bed rubbing her eyes sleepily with Doranbolt sitting next to her, running his fingers through her hair to gently wake her.

"I was in the main hall when one of the patients started convulsing from a high temperature. She's needed immediately." He smirked and pulled her onto his lap.

"YOU FUC-" Carla growled as they disappeared.

**Back in the Blue Pegasus main guild hall:**

Erza, Natsu, Happy, Grey, Lucy and Mira waited to greet their guild mates when they arrived.

*CRASH* The doors to the main hall were roughly kicked open. Gajeel stomped in followed by Pantherlily, Freed, Levy, and the wagon carrying the three infected women.

"More of Reedus' purple pigs! I'm all fired up!" Natsu started scratching their heads while licking his lips.

"Don't even think about it, Salamander! The one on the left is mine!" Gajeel shoved Natsu away from his claimed boar.

The three sick women in the wagon whimpered as Gajeel got closer to them. The small script mage tried to calm them down.

"Gajeel! You're scaring the ladies again!" Levy pulled on his arm in a sad attempt to prevent him from fighting with Natsu.

Freed pulled a large bag off of the wagon. "Mira, I know you left in a hurry. Lisanna packed a bag with your personal belongings and asked me to give it to you."

Jenny Realight intercepted the bag, "Oh, I got that for you, Mira." She smiled with an evil glint in her eye. "I'll take this to your room for you."

"Let me help you with that," Mira insisted to her modeling career rival.

"No, no. You guys have done so much to help my guild. Atleast let me get you settled in for the night. I insist." She smirked and dragged away Mira's bag.

"You're going to let that crazy bitch take your bag?" Gajeel raised a studded eyebrow at the she-demon.

"Of course! Jenny is my friend!" Mira smiled and tilted her head sweetly.

"I sense a malicious energy coming from your friend," a voice came from underneath the wagon.

"MAVIS?!" The Fairy Tail members exclaimed as she crawled out from under the wagon.

"Yes. The master of Blue Pegasus is a former member of Fairy Tail so I tagged along to see how his guild is growing." Mavis gestured over to Master Bob who waved back at her with a limp wrist.

"Well, now I know why Gajeel didn't give the women a hard time on the way here. He must have known that Mavis was with us…" Levy put a finger to her chin and remembered his peculiar behavior on this trip.

"Hmph." Gajeel crossed his arms over his chest which confirmed Levy's suspicion. "I smelled her on the wagon when we left. I have no idea why she rode underneath like a serial killer instead of with the girls."

"They would have sensed my presence and the poor dears were already frightened enough. Plus, Sixth will be relieved to hear that you didn't terrorize the women again." Mavis waved as she floated to the bar to chat with her former colleague.

Pantherlily watched as Mavis floated away, "I have a feeling that Master asked Mavis to keep an eye on you, Gajeel."

"That ghost girl doesn't scare me," Gajeel transformed his arm into a large chainsaw and took a swipe at one of the warthogs which made the women scream in terror.

Just before the chainsaw saw was about to slash off the pig's head, Erza stopped it with her adamantine armor. "Bickslow just sanitized these floors! You and Natsu take the boars outside. Freed, confine them so we can cook them for the meals tomorrow! Bickslow, get me a cheesecake with extra strawberries!"

Bickslow groaned and turned to the enchanted mops that were cleaning the floors, "Come on, Babies. Time to go back into your dolls."

The five dolls sitting on the bar came back to life as the mops fell to the floor lifeless.

"Oooh, there are so many different ways you can use seith magic. Think of all the fun toys you can possess…," Master Bob blushed as he winked at Bickslow.

Bickslow hurried out of the room with his babies following.

"Come on, Iron Face! I'll race you outside!" Natsu climbed on top of one of the warthogs.

Upon that challenge, Gajeel excitedly climbed onto the other warthog and morphed his hand into a steel blade which he swung behind him to cut the ropes that attached the pigs to the wagon. Freed sighed as he calmly walked after the rowdy dragon slayers riding the over sized warthogs, leaving Levy alone with the women in the wagon.

Erza requipped her sword away and straightened out her armor. "I'm going to go make sure there are enough strawberries on my cheese cake."

After Erza had left the main hall, Wendy and Doranbolt phased next to the patients and the young dragon slayer went right to work healing Nichiya.

Ichiya sat next to his twin soul and cried on an annoyed ice mage's shoulder. "Men… my cat is too handsome to die."

When she was finished healing the rest of the Blue Pegasus members, Levy called over to her from the wagon. "Wendy, do you have enough energy to heal the women from Magnolia?"

"Hi, Levy! Yes, I can heal them now." Wendy happily skipped over to the small script mage with Doranbolt slowing walking behind her.

The women still trembled from the verbal abuse from the iron dragon slayer. As soon as they were healed, the purple rune barriers dissipated. They were surprised to see that this 'S-Class' healing mage was just a little girl, but they thanked her profusely anyways.

"Hello, ladies." A smooth voice came from behind the dragon slayer. "I see that you just couldn't wait to see me again." The women scrambled out of the wagon and ran into Loke's arms crying about how mean Black Steel Gajeel was to them. "Don't worry, Ladies. If you stay close to me I can protect you from that jealous dragon." The celestial spirit held out his elbows so the women could hang on him and escorted them out of the main hall.

Tears came out of Wendy's eyes. She knew she would have to heal them all over again tomorrow. She could smell several of the female Blue Pegasus members on the lion already.

Gray started scratching at his naked chest. "If you're done for the day, Wendy, I would like to go to bed. I'm exhausted and my skin feels dry."

Wendy watched him scratch himself, "Um, yeah. I have only a little bit of magic left and I was going to use it on Mr. Doranbolt's hand."

"Alright, goodnight everybody." The naked ice mage left the main hall.

Wendy turned to Doranbolt, "You're the last one for the night!" She smiled as she took his hand and healed the deep burn.

"Thank you, Wendy. You're incredible." He smiled gently at her and left his hand in her small hands.

Levy raised an eyebrow at the awkward exchange.

Carla came floating into the main hall in a much better mood, "Wendy, you're done for the day! Bickslow is making strawberry cheesecake for everyone in the kitchen." The white exceed smiled at Levy and Wendy before she turned to the council member, "Oh, and Doranbolt, Erza said that she needed you outside for something."

"Yum, cheesecake sounds good! Come on, Levy, lets go to the kitchen! I'll see you in the morning, Mr. Doranbolt!" Wendy waved happily and made her way to the kitchen with her exceed and the petite script mage.

"Goodnight, Wendy." Doranbolt watched as they walked away and then hesitated a bit before he teleported outside of the guild to meet Erza...

**Outside the guild:**

Freed grumbled as he continued to set up the ruins to cage the warthogs until their slaughter tomorrow. "Do you guys have to be so noisy?"

"Go, Natsu!" Happy cheered from the sidelines.

The poor pigs squealed in terror as the dragon slayers raced each other on their backs. Gajeel morphed his feet into large spurs and continued to kick his hog as it raced toward the finish line while Natsu heated his body to make his hog race faster.

*CRUNCH* Neither of the dragons slayers had a chance to slow down when a high ranking council member phased directly in their path.

"That… bitch…" The bloody mess managed to cough out.

"Ew. What's that?" Natsu pointed at the mass of torn flesh and broken bones that groaned in pain from the dirt.

Gajeel sniffed the unidentifiable person, "Uh, I think it's Mest."

"Mest, you made me lose to Gajeel, you jerk!" Natsu whined.

"Lily, Salamander admits defeat!"

"It's not fair, Mest got in my way! I demand a rematch!"

"He got in my way, too! I won fair and square!"

Lily shook his head, "I'll go get Wendy."

Freed rubbed his temples, "This is why I never hang out at the guild…"

Doranbolt deeply regretted listening to Carla, the future-seeing exceed. He was sure that she had deliberately waited until the perfect moment to tell him to go outside otherwise he could have used his teleportation magic to avoid being trampled by large boars. He was definitely going to get Carla back for this...

* * *

**ANNOUNCEMENT! A bonus chapter is currently being drafted to accompany Wendy's First S-Class Mission. It will be Erza's mandatory sex-ed class. However, it will be rated M since it is a sexual education course. If you're not the type to be interested in rated M fics, then don't worry - it will be published separately as it is just bonus material. Follow The Evil Stick if interested!**

Thanks for reading, peeps! Much love and Happy Fourth of July!


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